I have come to learn that humans communicate in whole other levels aside from the basic forms of communication we know of, such as talking to one another or using body language to convey meaning. I have come to believe that there is a whole undercurrent of communication that happens that very often outweigh in helping us make decisions; big decisions such as whether to trust a person or not. Over the years I believe my ability to utilize this 'skill', if you may call it that, has become more and more trustworthy.
Often we feel guilty in allowing ourselves to feel repulsed by someone else's actions. For example a person might annoy us or rub us the wrong way and our immediate reaction is to 'turn the other cheek' or doubt the validity of our own feelings. We might suppress it and never once question why we actually feel annoyed. You CAN choose to literally respect your gut feelings or choose to do the total opposite and take a doubting stance towards yourself and suppress these feelings. But if we actually stay in the emotion as it arises we might learn something about ourselves. Perhaps our body's reaction to the situation is trying to tell us something about this person in relation to ourselves. I say "our body" for very often a feeling of simple annoyance comes with bodily reactions such a heart rate increase, or ever-so-minute muscle tightening, etc. Nevertheless, if we choose to look into it or the very least respect it, we might find that it might be better off not being around the person.
Lately, I've had to force myself to be, I guess you can call it "ruthless", on my social media sites such as twitter and Facebook due to my attempt to respect my reactions and my goal of purposefully aiming for peace in all my social relations. When situations, comments and/or dynamics create uncomfortable situations in my thoughts I listen tothese thoughts and to the way they make me feel. Now this is where being a mom has helped me save myself and has allowed me to better execute my goals for myself. Having 2 children now that I would simply die for in an instant has made me feel my own sense of worth and AWESOME power. If you have children you understand what I mean. A mothers' love is awe-inspiring to say the least. To give you some background, I grew up struggling with issues of worth and worthiness. Coming of age without a father around, who just happened to be alive and well, can do that to any young woman. But being a mother has given me back my power to value myself JUST as much as I value my kids. Therefore in valuing myself comes not allowing negative energies to invade your space. The discomfort I feel at any point in any interaction must be listened to, respected and acted upon if I am to find inner and outer peace in life; hence the ruthlessness with my social media sites as I would in real-life interactions. Just because someone is being rude on the computer does not mean it should be allowed. Listen to your discomforts too and CUT IT, cut it out fast and clean; in whatever form you see fit. Try it, you will see that your life too becomes much simpler too.
Buddhist beliefs about happiness
first image above borrowed from: http://www.thethreadsthatbindus.net/innerdragonreiki.htm
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