While I was pregnant with my first son who is now 5, my husband confessed to me that until our pregnancy he has never noticed one pregnant women; itwas like they had never been in his radar. I first did not believe him. "A fully grown man? never seen a pregnant women?" Surely that was not possible. But he was dead serious. It's no surprise that new life experiences ultimately open up new types of relationships and social possibilities as our pregnancy did for him. Suddenly, he saw pregnant women everywhere; in the market, in the elevators, next door, etc.
Similarly, after being the first woman to get pregnant in a teaching staff of fairly young single colleagues, I too noticed new types of people that I had not even noticed before; younger mothers, older mothers, and even grandmas. Having a 'family' opened me up to all new types of people and new ideas. It was the Renaissance of my life....a deep soulful awakening to all of humanity.
I am not surprised therefore when there are people in my life whom I see daily for over a year and choose to not address me in even the most mundane of pleasantries. I get it and do not spend a minute chewing it. For I too use to be there and know it's not an intentional type exclusion, but a purely experiential consequence of of a young mind. I too use to see and read the world through my own vocabulary and ignore all the other 'life' that revolved around me. It's what youth is all about in America and that is what we do as a 'modern' culture.
The fact that two people lack social or familial situations in common use to not be an impediment for social connection. Yet, in America it seems to be a huge and almost impenetrable wall for most. Although I know better than to take this situation personally, I find this a very sad and unfortunate consequence of an ego-centric American culture which emphasizes competition and cheap leadership based on pushing others down in order to elevate the few. Each generation misses out the gifts and expertise from the last generation and exists absolutely disconnected from one another. In addition, each new fresh generation dispossesses the last from its most valuable gift, experience, by simply ignoring it. YET, by doing so also sets in motion how they themselves will be treated when they too become 'old and wise.'
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