8/9/10

Gifts of getting older.....yes, there are MANY!!!

I am loving getting older. Seriously!! I feel that the older I get the more I can see and feel things clearer and enjoy life better. Reminds me of an old comfy t-shirt, and the more we wear it the more we feel good in it regardless of its looks. With this type of momentum I can't help to imagine what my state of mind will be like 5, 10, 15 years from now.
I have been noticing this slow process of shedding away of ideas, deliberately choosing and sorting out thoughts that might pop up and cause problems. But my biggest self-taught lesson lately has been this disengagement from needing others' understanding as a condition for me feeling better.
An example about this comes to mind in situations where my hubby might not agree with me on some key issue. The old Miriam would keep both up for hours trying to "resolve" the issue, when in fact it was truly a misguided attempt at trying to get him to adopt my version of whatever we were bickering about. But once you divorce yourself from that need to have us both see it 'my way', then the entire situation becomes lighter and much more manageable. All I ask myself at this point is whether or not I am fine with my version and if I am then I walk away satisfied. Amazing things happen.
The act of walking away also brings me the gift of time. Oh time. How amazing a healer time can be. Without words, without arguments, time comes in and like magic lifts the heaviness away from even the most intense conflicts. I am absolutely using it as a healing tool from this day forward and vow to respect its powers in all future conflicts. Put 10, 30 minutes or even a night's sleep in between you and an ardent relationship and what do you get? You get a much lighter situation than what you started with. An absolutely magical tool.

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